The saddest tale I've ever told.

The Drokarus Chronicles.

The Drokarus Chronicles, or The Chronicles of Drokarus, or however you wish to say it. It's the story. The story of how it all started. How Drokarus began, and what happened since the beginning. In this tome, I have archived significant events that have occurred that bear some connection to Drokarus. So lets start from the start, shall we?

I believe it was September, of 2004. I remember it was bright outside, but cold. I was really bored, so I thought I'd try out a little game my friend used to play. It was called Runescape. So I went to Runescape.com, and began.

I am a fantasy buff. I devour and write as much fantasy literature as I can. So naturally, I've got creative flair in the names I choose for games. So when it came time to choose a username, I signed myself in as “Drokarus”. Why? I'm not sure. The name just came to me. It has no special relevance to anything at all (and if it does, it's purely coincidental).

So I began. I started in Tutorial Island, and moved through that quickly, to emerge in a place called Lumbridge. After spending a few hours amassing a fortune of 300gp from Goblins, I realised this repetitive motion was boring, so I stopped.

I stopped for a month.

One month later, I found another of my friends, Vick3rz, was playing. To help me, he gave me jobs mining and smelting bronze bars. I had to get 100 bronze bars for 7k.

Now that I look back on that, I think 7k isn't very much, but at the time, it was heaps. It was more than I could hope to achieve, yet there it was, staring me in the eyes.

Soon, I saved to 20k. It was then that I started working on other things. Mining was always my favourite though, as it was where I started from. I began mining essence.

I remember thinking that doing the Rune Mysteries quest was droll and boring. Now that I look back, Rune Mysteries is one of the shortest quests I've ever done.

So, I got into the essence trade, spending hours a day mining essence and selling them for 20gp each. I soon got other friends involved in the game, teaching them of the essence trade.

Eventually, I moved on. I started woodcutting. When I got to 15, I bought myself a steel axe. By this time, I could wield up to mithril. I know this because I remember walking around mostly with a mithril scimitar and mith plate, with steel legs, shield and helm.

Now I must explain a crucial part of the Drokarus story. The induction into Sals Runescape Forum (affectionately known as Slams).

It was because of a friend. He wanted me to find him a deal for Dragon Legs, so I searched google, and came upon two forums. One of them was Sals forum. It looked friendlier than the other one, which had a dark theme, and a messy layout, which I think discouraged me in the first place.

This was way back around Christmas time. I remember the board icons were Candy Canes.

So I registered for Sals forum. I don't think I ever posted a welcome post, however mine would come in another form. I was to become known by a post I made after the Sals Christmas Party.

We were in the Wilderness, level 42. 1800151100 was shouting for quiet. I knew 1800 was an admin of Sals forum, so I paid attention and respect to him. However, the person standing on me started talking. 1800 began fire blasting me. I ran, naturally. What else could I do? I had to run. My own comrades had turned on me. It was on my exit from Wilderness that I met up with the likes of Fraff5 and Templarrush, along with some other rag-tags that had broken off from 1800's group. We organised a plan to get back at 1800.

I often look back at times like these, and marvel at my brilliance. While it wasn't a very nice thing to do, it was an event worthy of mention. It is because of this that most all active Sals members now know the name Drokarus.

I posted on Sals that 1800 had Fire Blasted me for no reason. Within a half hour, 17 pages had sprung up arguing about the topic. Finally, the thread was closed after much heated debate and arguing about how 1800 and Titan2k4 were evil people, and deserved to be punished. Thread locked, problem solved, right? Wrong.

Similar thread were then inspired, and sprung up all over the forum. A lot of them, actually. So much so that Sal himself had to close the board in order for the moderators to clean everything up, and to calm everybody down. It was a tactful move, and worked. It was over. It was Sals first of the great Flame Wars (of which there were 3).

So, life continued as normal on Sals. I went on playing Runescape. Due to this event, I had become very good friends with Templarrush (later known as Lempytush and iTush). Me and Templarrush always hung out together. It was really fun.

It was around this time I met Celticd208. Celtic was one of my best friends on Runescape also. Me and Celtic met in the essence mines one day. We were friends within seconds (weird, huh?).

We spent many a time chatting about what was going on, in real life and in Runescape. It was because of this I later chose him to be first General of the “Noble Rabbits” (later).

So around April, I joined up with a clan called the Hatebreeds. This was in fact one of the Forum Clans, led by none other than Master Hexias himself (became on of my best buds later).

Hexias led us to many glorious battles, and it was underneath his banner that we united. As he constantly reminded us in his pk trip screenies, “We pwn the wildy!”.

Yes, the Hatebreeds truly did own. However, I did a grievous thing, which I regret to this day. I betrayed the Hatebreeds.

You see, during the time I was with the Hatebreeds, I had also grown friendly, and used to train with some of the MMAPKERS (Money Making Anti Pkers, later known as SC).

So I began to talk to one of the leaders of the mmapkers, Aratreak, and then Snowzak, about joining the mmapkers.

It was then that the battle began to rage inside me. I was torn between HB and Mmapkers. This is about to get deep. I have never told the following to anybody.

Aratreak told me of a pk trip he was going on. I asked if I could come. I believe he was reluctant, as I was a member of the HB, and a sworn enemy (clan-wise). But he let me come. Due to his kindness, I wasn't killed on my first step into wilderness with them, because most of the Mmapkers recognised my name, and wished to slay me were it not for Ara's intervention.

So we set off. I alerted Hexias, and told him to bring as many Hatebreeds as possible, which was about 7 compared to the Mmapkers 20 or so. So above the Bandit camp, the Hatebreeds ambushed the Mmapkers. It was a bloody battle, but the Hatebreeds managed to overcome those that hadn't run. In the confusion, I escape being pursued by Eil and several of the other Mmapkers. When they had arrived at the bank, most of the Mmapkers shouted that I was the traitor. This is where I must credit Ara's kindness, and regret my deceit. Because when asked by Ara and Snowzak if I had betrayed them, I said no. They believed me. It is partly because of this that they are counted among my most valued friends today.

A Mmapker vs Hatebreeds vs Guthix (another forum clan) war was approaching. Once again, I started passing information to both sides. The Hatebreeds gained information on what the Mmapkers would do, and the Mmapkers gained Maps and battle plans from the Hatebreeds. This war would determine who I would choose.

The Mmapkers won. It was a crushing defeat for the Hatebreeds, who were devastated by their loss. It was inevitable. Hexias has real-life obligations to tend to in the form of a gorgeous sorceress by the name of Haggard (aka Rachel). So the Hatebreeds were led by Imperial04, the master of disaster, and lack of organisation got the better of the Hatebreeds.

I regret to inform you, the reader, that I wasn't at this war. So if some of the details about the event seems not quite right to you, forgive my ignorance.

After the war, both sides signed a “No-Spies” treaty, bound by honour that neither leader would permit their members to spy on the enemy.

This is really where the Forum Clan story ends. The Forum Clans fell apart after this, and nobody continued them. Although there is rumour that the Hatebreeds are biding their time, growing in strength. And in the coming storm, I know who I shall support.

Until the beginning of the Noble Rabbits.

With the demise of the Mmapkers and Forums Clans, I yearned for the team feeling one could achieve from being in a Clan. So I remembered a little thing me and some friends did a while ago.

This is about to get nitty gritty. Balls to bones, The Noble Rabbits were anything but. We basically exploited noobs. We quickly discovered things like paying noobs 10gp each to get people to steal silk for us, then we would sell to the merchant for twice as much. We also frequently entered the f2p worlds to buy essence for low low prices. This is how the Noble Rabbits began, with me, Sir Lins, and Inspyr.

In reflection, I am greatly remorseful about how that turned out. I can't believe I exploited people that I was once. I feel awful, and if I could apologise to each and every newb that I liberated money from, I would.

However, I chose to put up a front. A friendlier appearance for The Noble Rabbits, to attract more to our cause. It was through this, I met Squirreld00d.

At the time, Squirreld00d was only level 47. It was a 50+ clan to start with, but I let him join because I felt generous at the time. Squirreld00d was a great friend of mine, and still is. I regret his decision to join WoW though...

We spent many hours discussing different things, as with Celticd208, who had also become Squirreld00d's friend (He was recruited earlier this year into the US forces. May fate guide his way home).

Thanks to Squirreld00ds frequent loss of armour, he was forced to woodcut to make money. This is how he achieved his 85+ woodcutting goal. He is now on his 5^th set of Dharok's armour. As a result, squirrel never had much time for non-combat. So while he became much stronger than me, his overall didn't come anywhere near mine, as I was mainly non-combat.

So we went out with the other clan members (20 regulars. I like to keep my clans on all games smallish) on pk trips, and had parties, and all sorts of things. It was exciting.

Unfortunately, a malicious person, who I still don't know (although I do suspect strongly it was Vick3rz, who at this time was using Technology for the wrong reasons. He was also frequently autoing), hacked our forums, and closed it. This meant we lost our base of communication, as a lot of the NR members were on at different times.

We started a new forum, but still couldn't bring back all that we had before. The brilliance of this clan was lost.

Another friend I made in NR was Anti-Paladin. At the time, he was level 76. I still wonder why he wanted to join a 50+ clan, but his help was appreciated. AP quickly became somebody I could trust, and eventually came to Sals. Amazing how all of the Noble Rabbits eventually found their way home.

Once again, Slams life continued as normal.

I went on. I decided that I would stand up for what I believed in, and was not afraid to speak out against things that I deemed unfair, or not right. This gained me the respect of many, and the hatred of many more. It was in these times that I think I tested my friends to the limit. I had announced my allegiances publicly, for all to see, rather than remaining politically ambiguous. It was around this time Sal came up with the Distinguished Member idea. Happily, I accepted the title as one of the first DM's, paving the way for those to come. I wore my badge with honour, and never failed to use my influence where it was needed. Because I believe that is what being a Distinguished Members is about. You get that little blue badge to show that you're opinion counts, else you wouldn't be wearing it.

Being a DM was alright. We got to open and close our own topics, as well as have our own secret forum where we mostly spammed (a tradition I hear continues to this day).

It was not long after this that Sean, through Beeboy, suggested the IRC chat room. It would be hosted on irc.swiftirc.net and the channel: #knightsean.

Sal decided that to monitor these channels, a new group needed to be created. So the group named Chat Moderators was born. It was decided that me, Sean, Twin4819 (upon my recommendation to Sal) and some others would lead this team.

The chat caused many problems. People continuously pestered the moderators and admins about who should be warned for what which happened on chat. I remember Titan suspended me for 999 days on Sals because I called him a noob while he was under a different alias (Tee). Ah, now I look back on it, I laugh. It was just stupid, a pointless argument that was exaggerated into something larger.

That's where it got out of hand. This is where I went a bit mad. Very mad, to be honest.

I started flaming, and insulting people at every opportunity I could get. Sure, I justified in the DM forum one day, my parents had just split up and it was a tough time. But no, I knew in the back of my mind I was taking the cowards way out and blaming it on somebody else. Once again, my deceit played a great part, as I believe it caused deflected blows against my flaming. If I hadn't been such a convincing storyteller, I don't think I would've lasted for as long as I did.

And so I continued rampantly flaming, until I was suspended. I was removed of my powers.

After a while, I was un-suspended, only to continue my bad streak again, and get suspended again. I was twice more suspended and twice more unsuspended.

It was here that I began the final showdown.

One night, I was bored, and in a particularly foul (insane) mood. So I looked up the rules, and copy/pasted them into Word. I decided I would break every rule, except those that go against my morals (which was two rules: Posting pornography and racism).

So I logged onto Sals. One by one I ticked off the rules as I broke them until I was left with two more?

I asked myself at this point; Do I dare break my morals?

No. That is what makes us human. The ability to consciously decide against doing something. The ability to have principles is a trait only enabled to Human beings. I would not break something I believed in.

So I broke every rule, and then began my large, winding goodbye post. It was quite good, actually. Marvelous. Shame it was deleted. Hexias, one of my greatest friend's and allies, even honored me by saying I could one day become the next Hexias. If you knew Hex as well as I did, you'd know that this was high praise. It was with that comment that Hexias closed the thread, to stop the flaming that ensued against me.

It was before that point, however, that I had asked Cameron, later to be one of my trusty, loyal, and fair friends. In fact, I could say that Cam could almost become the next Drokarus one day, if he put a bit more spice into his posts.

And so I ended my life at slams.

The End.

Wrong. I had heard rumours before I was banned through my extensive network that a move was in motion. Sal had planned to move to IPB 2.0.

I supported this, because IPB is superb software, and Sal would be able to move to a semi-dedicated server rather than using invisionfree to host his forum. It meant more possibility than before.

It was one day that my good friend Sean was on MSN, and gave me the URL. He said that the slate was clean, and that Sal had promised that all those who were banned before were now able to start afresh. To protect my identity, and to avoid biased people with long memories, I changed my name so Samster. This name, however, had a meaning.

During my mean streak, I posted a guide. It was a guide to “Forum Raging” from myg0t.com

I find myg0t hilarious, actually. They're just a bunch of internet pranksters, really. Anyway, the name Samster was part of my legacy to myg0t. Only the particularly keen (in other words, nobody on Slams) could've picked up the connection. Samster is one of the higher ranked members of myg0t.

So I began anew as Samster. I still embodied the fiery passion of Drokarus, and I now know that a few noticed that. I immediately alerted my old friends and allies that I had come to the forum, and that the happy times could begin. I also apologised covertly to several people that I had wronged, and felt I could trust with my identity.

So it began. Many people left in the new forum, but it was a long time coming. Beeboy was one of the most significant to leave. Cameron and Sal (although Sal is very good at concealing his feelings) were angry at Beeboy, for he had repeated a previous error (when he became an Admin on the old forum, he made a lot of changed without telling anyone). He gave Sean admin privileges, and complete control of the UCS (United Clans of Sals. Finally Danny's idea had come to fruition).

This angered a lot of the moderating team also, as Cam had (and still has) great sway over the higher ranks. His vote can make or break most decisions of Slams. Cameron is perhaps the wisest and fairest admin on Sals (not counting Salmoneus himself of course). He is also the most feared, due to the fact he has been given the title of “Baninator”, as he gets to ban bad people.

And so, Beeboy got upset because he felt Cam was being unjust, and so he left.

This caused GuardianCRD to leave, but then he came back.

Back to Drokarus.

At this time, I was still browsing the boards, cruising along. I had lost most interest in Runescape, so I mostly just trolled the Tech, Debate, and Scape lounge forums. Through the Debate forum, I was able to channel my destructive force into something more creative. I used my anger to fuel my intelligence, and learned that I had a fanatical ability to swing arguments. I was able to think quick, and insert wit into most comments. I was a new being.

In fact, I was talking to a person today about myself, and the person said “I miss the old drok”. It seemed that the person missed the fiery, destructive old Drokarus.

I had to disagree with her. This little missy seemed to have missed the wisdom that comes with being at peace with others. During this stage, I was able to relieve myself of pointless insults, I was able to control if I posted (I remember certain Zombie Kid posts I mastered myself to stay out of). My self restraint actually had meaning.

In the Tech Forum, I learnt to help people. I associated myself with a guy named Naota, who I found knew a great deal about Technology, so we got along really well. Together, along with Twin (we had become good friends by now) we solved most of the problems that the Sals members had with their computers. We quickly became known as the trusted opinions behind computer maintenance.

Soon after the Tech Support team was formed, consisting of myself, Naota, and JamesT. Later on we recruited Samurai5911 and mbridges.

The Tech Support team continued to blitz the problems in the Tech forums.

A couple of months later, I was interviewed for the first ever SalCast, a podcast for Sal’s forum done by Dissentor, Zed Doomstar, and elvis66. The podcast was a huge success.

Later, I took my leave of Sal’s forum. I felt that I had done what I could, and had left my mark on the forum forever. It was my time. I sadly left a leaving note, and not long after was banned.

And so Drokarus ended.

Jun 3 2006, 10:54 AM

Quoth the raven “nevermore”

- Edgar Allen Poe